31 Days to Bless Your Home: Easy Tips for the Domestically Challenged
Week 3- The Glamorous Side of Homemaking: Cleaning, Organizing, and Decluttering
Day 15 – Finding Balance and Tackling the Clutter Monster
“She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.” Proverbs 31:27 NIV
and does not eat the bread of idleness.” Proverbs 31:27 NIV
This week’s challenge: It is time to roll up our sleeves and give our homes some extra TLC this week. What have you been putting off? This is the week to tackle it!
Today’s challenge: Choose one junk drawer, or one paper pile, or one corner of clutter and attack it today! 15 minutes is all it takes!
When I first began teaching, I often stayed up through the wee hours of the morning grading papers and always playing the catch up game. I stayed overwhelmed most of the time as I constantly tried to claw my way through that ever growing mountain of paper work, and I never found my to the top until the final report card went home after the last day of school. Then, after a few weeks off for summer, I jumped right back into that infernal mountain all over again!
Why did I do that to myself?
Often, as I looked around my house, I realized a pattern that had taken root into every area of my life, not just the paper grading fiend. I could see the mound of laundry waiting for my attention, the high rise of dishes getting higher by the moment, the spill-over of clutter consuming every room in my house, and I don’t even want to mention the overgrown lawn and shrubbery that looked like giant fingers trying to reach up and grab a hold of our entire house!
What was wrong with me? Why was I living like that when I had “June Cleaver” for a mother? Surely she had taught me much better than that! Let us go back in time for a moment, and then I will share with you how I overcame the monster.
What I had learned from my mother was that having an orderly and perfectly pristine house at all times created a woman who was exhausted, unavailable, constantly feeling guilty if anything was out of place, grouchy, and never at rest. Is that what being a Proverbs 31 woman was all about! That was not for me!
Now, to my mom’s credit, she did learn how to relax and enjoy life as she eventually incorporated more balance into her life. She was there for us as teenagers, and she took time to pursue her favorite hobbies. She read books, studied her Bible, and took time for crafts. However, it was not always like that. Her impossible standards really took a toll on her for many years because she wanted so badly to be the perfect wife and mother.
When I became a mother, I was determined not to fall into that perfectionism trap, but rather to focus on what was more important in life, my husband and children. I would proudly point out the cobwebs in the corner or the unmade beds and proclaim that I would rather spend time with my children than to waste it on things that don’t really matter, like cleaning house. Oh my goodness, was I ever a mess when my kids were little!!!
I know my heart was in the right place, but I had drifted so far to the other extreme that I could not see how the clutter monster was choking me and my family! Yes, I had the most amazing relationship with my children, and we had the best of times together. We home schooled and played together every moment. We went on trips, read books together, went for walks, rode bikes, and participated in church activities and community sports. My kids were my life! However, I did not realize how badly I was shortchanging them by not setting a positive example of being a good steward of our home. The clutter was embarrassing and depressing!
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| This is what I imagine the clutter monster to look like! |
For a time, I had developed a workable system of keeping things under control to a degree when I began teaching piano lessons at home. I had to have a reasonably clean home to have students over every day, and that prompted me to find a way to overcome my messy habits. My children and I used chore charts and worked as a team to keep things somewhat in order. I made sure the kitchen and living room were in super-duper shape, and then we closed the doors to the rest of the house!
That brings me back to my dilemma. Even though I was finally making strides to improve, the clutter monster was still in control! I could see its influence in my career as well as my home. I will never regret the time I spent with my children, but in trying not to be as strict as my own mother, I had missed out on the peace and joy that accompanies a home that is well-managed. It was time for me to go back to “Homemaking 101” and learn a new lifestyle.
The very trigger that turned it all around for me was this one quote by the Flylady concerning keeping on top of laundry. “A load a day keeps chaos away.” It was that simple! That one quote changed my life! I credit her website for turning my home and my life around too as I learned to incorporate her time-saving habits and discipline. I highly recommend that you visit her site!
Now, how could a quote make that much difference? It was a beginning for me. It was about much more than laundry, but it was a principle I needed to practice. I had learned that my mother’s extreme example on one end, and my extreme example on the other end were neither the way to live a blessed and whole life. My mother had learned marvelous balance, and now it was my turn. I began by using that quote for every single area of my life, not just laundry.
The very first thing I conquered was grading papers. Instead of procrastinating until the mound of papers was overwhelming, and I found myself staying up all night and hating my job, I simply did a small chunk at a time every time I had a chance. It was kind of like the “load a day,” and it really did keep “chaos away!” I found that I was able to keep papers graded on time and update the online grade book on a daily basis. I no longer had to stay up all night or feel bogged down. I maintained consistency, and my students’ parents loved the change as much as I did!
When I saw how wonderfully that worked on my job, I decided to incorporate it at home. I have told you this entire story to bring you to this point – how to tackle the clutter monster in your homes for good!
Here are some things I began doing:
1. I do at least a load of laundry (or several!) nearly every day. When my kids lived at home, it had to be every day. No longer did that mountain overwhelm me again!2. The dishes are cleaned immediately after every use. I no longer wait until the pile is so high that it becomes a dread, but I enjoy the pleasure of having a clean kitchen every day. Something else I learned from the Flylady is that I never go to bed without a “shiny sink.” The kitchen is the hub of our home, so I learned to keep it clean and orderly.3. We all take a few minutes before bed every single day to pick up anything we have left out. When you stay on top of clutter, it is so much easier to maintain.4. If you have “hot spots” (as The Flylady calls our clutter areas) set your timer for a few minutes each day and clear away a bit at a time. Don’t try to do it all at once. This will be less overwhelming, and you will more likely keep it up.5. Our paper pile still gets a little out of control. When we don’t have time to sort it, we keep it all in an inbox; or some call it a junk drawer. At least it is out of the way until we have time to deal with it properly.6. Make it a habit of handling things only once. That means to take care of it or put it away immediately. Don’t put it somewhere it doesn’t belong when you are finished with it to put away later. Don’t feed that monster!7. When you are in a hurry to get ready, still make an effort to put things away immediately after use, such as brushes, flat irons, hairspray, makeup, etc. Just don’t leave it out, and you won’t have to go put it away later.8. When you cook, clean as you go. (My mom’s mantra!)9. Remember that you are creating a home, not a showroom. I am not advocating perfection, nor do I want that! There will be some mess, especially if your children are young, and that is OK! I repeat, it is OK! Remember balance and priorities! Prayerfully consider where you should place your standards.10. I found a great cleaning schedule so I wouldn’t go crazy on some days and let the house fall apart on other days. A good schedule helps you stay on top. I’ll cover my own cleaning schedule on another day, but I have seen an excellent one on Time-Warp Wife.
Hallelujah! Yes, this is something for which to praise God! While trying to be a Proverbs 31 woman seemed overwhelming and exhausting as a young mother, I am so glad that God showed me that the opposite extreme is also just as exhausting and was no way to live. He has taught me balance, and after 47 years, I am finally living it!
I promise you that balanced living leads to much happier and more peaceful homes and families. Take it from someone who has lived in both extremes and found her niche’ somewhere in the middle.
Take these three words with you to sum up what we have learned here today:
- Discipline: Ouch! I know; what a painful word sometimes! However, that really is God’s way. While He does not want perfectionism, He does want us to honor Him with our very best effort. It takes self-discipline, or the fruit of the Spirit called self-control, for us to maintain optimum balance in our homes and lives. Let us work diligently and include our homemaking and parenting as worship to the Lord. Let us give God glory in all that we say and do!
“…And don’t just do the minimum that will get you by. Do your best. Work from the heart for your real Master, for God, confident that you’ll get paid in full when you come into your inheritance. Keep in mind always that the ultimate Master you’re serving is Christ. The sullen servant who does shoddy work will be held responsible. Being a follower of Jesus doesn’t cover up bad work.” Colossian 3:22b-25 MSG
- Balance: I think the most important concept I had to learn was balance. Please do not try to be a “June Cleaver,” but don’t be a slob like I was either. Prayerfully seek the place in the middle where God would have you. Some mess is OK, but in the big picture, you and your family will be much happier with a degree of cleanliness and order.
- Consistency: Don’t knock yourself out trying to do it all at one time. The best way to conquer that clutter monster is a little at a time, consistently. It may take you months to get your home where you want it to be, and that is OK. Be patient and watch the progression as you take baby steps every day. Just like the story of the tortoise and the hare, the tortoise may have been slow, but his consistency is what brought him the victory!
Wow, today was fun for me! I hope you enjoyed this as much as I have! I also hope you have discovered ideas that will help you overcome the clutter monster that has been trying to take over our homes.
Join me throughout this week as I share ideas for organizing, cleaning our kitchens and bathrooms, and some great shortcuts to make our work just a little easier.
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Thank you, and God bless you and your home!
Shari Lewis
