Are We Helping Or Hurting?
I was the only kid in my fourth grade class who had never ridden a bike. Well, without training wheels that is! Can you believe it? FOURTH GRADE!
The rugged and hilly terrain of my childhood home had not afforded the opportunity to learn this required skill of every child of my generation. However, now that we had just moved into a new subdivision in Alexandria, VA, this was the perfect place to learn! I felt the pressure as many of my classmates rode their bikes by my house calling for me to join them.
I can picture it now. There I stood, a tall, awkward, frizzy-haired and plain-looking girl, the new girl in the neighborhood. I had made friends easily enough, but now was the true test to see if I really did fit in to this already tight-knit bunch. I felt awkward enough as it is; did they need to rub it in with the many ride-by’s?
My dad had bought me a beautiful new, ultra-girly, glittery purple bike with a pink daisy banana seat and sparkly pink streamers hanging from the handlebars. My brother took it a step farther and added rainbow colored spoke straws to jazz it up even more. I was set! Now what?
Did I mention the training wheels still attached to it? I didn’t dare join my new friends looking like a baby! It was time to get over my fear!
The day of reckoning finally came. Several of my new friends came to my house and saw my dad trying to teach me how to ride my bike. There it was – the truth was out! Now they knew! Oh horror!
While I was expecting ridicule, that was not what I got at all. They began cheering for me and encouraging me. I felt a wave of courage and determination wash over me. This was going to be the day! I just knew it!
After falling on my rump more times than I could count, I finally learned to balance, and I did it! I was riding a bike! For real!
From that day on, there was no stopping me! I rode my bike throughout the neighborhood every day from the moment I got home from school until it was time to go in for dinner, bath, and bed. Homework? Ahem, I don’t recall that part!
I think it is funny that I was reminiscent of a childhood memory tonight. What is precious to me from this memory is how my friends helped me learn instead of making fun of me for not being able to ride a bike like they all could. Instead of ostracizing me from the group because I was uncoordinated, new, and had horribly frizzy hair, they put much effort into making me feel like a part of their group. It was their encouragement that gave me the determination I needed to finally get over my fear.
Now, this gets me thinking about modern relationships and my daily encounters with others as an adult. How many times have we unknowingly and unintentionally caused someone to not feel included as part of our “clique?” Is it possible that something we may have said might have injured or discouraged someone’s heart? Perhaps our rosy portrayal of the “perfect life” has festered the wounds of a sister in Christ who is struggling just to get by. Do we make a point to make others feel included? Do we acknowledge the innate value of others in our realm of influence, or is it easier to ignore people with whom we don’t feel like associating? What if someone in our church, or someone we encounter during our busy day is teetering in their relationship with God, and something we may say or do, or not say or do, just may be the catalyst for setting them over the edge of throwing in the towel?
I am not saying that we are accountable for the decisions or attitudes of others; however, we must acknowledge the grand opportunity we have to make a difference – either positive or negative – in the lives of everyone we encounter every day. What an awesome responsibility we have as daughters of the King!
Let us make it our life’s mission to encourage, help, bless, and minister to everyone we can, in every way we can, and as often as we can. Be aware of people around us. Take notice. You may never know when something you said or did was the very thing that person needed. Don’t hold back if you have the opportunity to encourage or cheer someone on. It is not always something as simple as learning how to ride a bike, but perhaps someone you meet today needs your encouragement as they deal with a broken relationship, a hurting heart, a major life decision, financial stress, managing a special needs child, nursing elderly parents, or trying to make it on their own for the first time. Who knows?
And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. Hebrews 10:24-25 NIV
Finally, all of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude. 1 Peter 3:8 NLT